You and me against the world
Right now, as you start your new meat-free life, you can decide what sort of a vegetarian you’re going to be. And the best way to decide that is to think about all of the people you’ve known in your life who have tried to convert you to their personal way of living.
We all know the type. The two-pack-a-day smoker who gives up cigarettes and then lectures everyone within earshot on the dangers of second-hand smoke. The born-again Christian who drops the Lord’s name into every conversation and acts as a self-proclaimed expert on morality. The former boozehound that takes the 12 Steps so seriously that you can’t even swallow an antihistamine in their presence without getting an earful about addiction.
And you know what? We really, really don’t like those people. So don’t become one!
You’ve made an important life choice that’s going to improve most areas of your life, most notably your health. And it will be tempting to loudly proclaim to everyone around you about how great vegetarianism is – after all, you’ve made positive changes that would benefit everyone, right? The problem is, most people are turned off by in-your-face proselytizing, and you’ll do more to drive them away from the idea of meatless eating than you will to convert them. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t be honest about your choices – but badgering your friends and family takes it a step too far.
Some of the most influential people in the world have been those who quietly live their lives by their own principles, inspiring others to choose similar paths as they lead by example. Others will ask questions about your vegetarianism, and you should definitely be prepared to answer those questions. But if you find yourself continually battling with other people, arguing with them about your choices and creating bad feelings, then you need to take a good, hard look at how you’re getting across your message.
The big “why”
Your co-workers, your family, your friends, and even people you meet socially will have questions about your vegetarianism. The question are wide ranging, but they’re probably all the same questions that you had when you first started this journey:
“How do you get enough protein if you don’t eat meat?”
“What do you eat?”
“Do you eat chicken? (or fish, or eggs &hellip
”
“Don’t you miss meat?”
“Can you still have dessert?”
“Why do you wear leather shoes?”
“Why can’t you drink milk?”
… and on, and on, and on. The best way to deal with these questions is to have a simple, honest answer ready. You’re not required to go into detail about every aspect of your diet , and it’s best if you don’t – unless someone is really, really curious about those details. Don’t try to sell them on vegetarianism. Just answer the questions, smile and move on.
There’s an old show business axiom that goes, “always leave ‘em wanting more.” When people ask you about your vegetarianism, they’re curious about what’s so great about it. The happier and more secure – and non-judgmental about their eating – that you are, the more they’ll suspect that there’s something valuable in it. Your answers will make them want to find out more, so they’ll seek out more information. You may even be the one they come to, looking for advice.
In essence, you’re an ambassador for vegetarianism. You know how superior your new lifestyle is, but that doesn’t mean you have to act superior. If you have a positive, happy, low-key attitude towards your food choices, that will affect the way that people see not just you, but vegetarianism, too.
Treading gently on the earth and on other people’s feelings
You’ll have countless experiences in the coming years where you’re surrounded by people eating meat, and where maintaining a meatless lifestyle is a challenge. You may be on a road trip with friends, and the only place to eat is a fast-food burger joint. Or a family picnic turns out to be a non-stop barbecue with the main fare consisting of burgers, hot dogs and ribs. In these situations, your only option is to find whatever you can to eat – a glass of apple juice or diet soda, a handful of potato chips, some cole slaw – and make the best of the situation.
This won’t happen very often, because vegetarians really do have a wide range of food choices, but when it does it’s up to you to behave with dignity. Eat what you can, and show how adaptable you are. This will not only show them what a charming, adult, and flexible person you are, it’ll also give them a good impression of vegetarianism as a whole – remember, most meat-eaters fear that switching to a meatless lifestyle will be boring and difficult! By showing them that it’s not, you’re soft-selling vegetarianism.
If you’re going to be dining out with a mixed group of vegetarians and non-vegetarians, do what you can to get everyone to agree on a restaurant that has plenty of vegetarian options. If these are family members or close friends (as opposed to, say, a business function) you can even ask politely if everyone would be okay with eating somewhere that has menu items for vegetarians – it’s likely that they’ll accommodate you with a minimum of grumbling.
If you’re vegan, the challenge will be even greater, and you’ll find that you have to be the most adaptable vegetarians of all. While most restaurants today plan their menus with an eye towards offering vegetarian options, few offer much – if anything – for vegans. You’ll find that you have to “make do” when dining out, especially with a mixed group that includes non-vegetarians. But the important thing is to do it with grace, not drawing undue attention to your special dietary needs.
In fact, some vegetarians make special allowances for times that they have absolutely no control over the food that’s available and will eat foods made with eggs or dairy. This way, they can socialize with non-vegans without going hungry or risking negative interactions because of their dietary restrictions. It’s not the ideal way to live as a vegan, of course, but we live in an imperfect world – the most important thing is to stay true to your principles as much as you realistically can, and inspire others to see vegetarianism as a positive, flexible lifestyle. Remember, the more attractive you make it look, the more likely it is that they’ll want to try it themselves!
