The Big Why

Your co-workers, family, friends, and even people you meet socially will have questions about your vegetarianism. The questions are wide-ranging, but they’re all probably the same questions that you had when you first started this journey:

“How do you get enough protein if you don’t eat meat?” “What do you eat?”
“Do you eat chicken (or fish, or eggs …)?” “Don’t you miss meat?”
“Can you still have dessert?”
“Why do you wear leather shoes?” “Why can’t you drink milk?”

… and so on. The best way to deal with these questions is to have a simple, honest answer ready. You’re not required to go into detail about every aspect of your diet, and it’s best if you don’t—unless someone is really curious about those details. Don’t try to sell them on vegetarianism. Just answer the questions, smile, and move on.

There’s an old show business axiom that goes, “Always leave ’em wanting more.” When people ask you about your vegetarianism, they’re curious about what’s so great about it. The happier, more secure, and more nonjudgmental about other people’s eating that you are, the more they’ll suspect that there’s something valuable in it. Your answers will make them want to find out more, so they’ll seek out more information. You may even be the one they come to, looking for advice.

In essence, you’re an ambassador for vegetarianism. You know how better your new lifestyle is for you, the planet, and the animals. But that doesn’t mean you have to act superior. If you have a positive, happy, low-key attitude toward your food choices, that will affect the way that people see not just you, but vegetarianism, too.

Support is Key

Surrounding yourself with likeminded vegetarians is key. There is always power in numbers. And when you surround yourself with positive reinforcement, you will be less likely to revert back to your nonvegetarian ways.

If you happen to live in a large city, there are probably numerous local vegetarian support groups lurking around every corner. Use the Internet to locate one of these groups and attend a meeting. You may feel like an outsider at first, but once you talk and listen to other members of the group who were once in your shoes, you will feel more at home. Most meetings are informal and revolve around discussions of transition, tips, recipes, personal struggles, and the positive impact that vegetarianism has on the world as a whole. Try using meetup.com, a great forum for local groups to recruit members and connect through the Internet. There are a variety of vegetarian-themed groups that will help you meet like-minded individuals in your area. (You can also join veggie123.com discussion forums.)

You can become an active member of one of the many national vegetarian organizations across the country. Though they function quite differently than local organizations, they can still offer some form of support. Sign up for their monthly newsletter (if they have one) or visit their Web site and join the forum. Interacting with other vegetarians is the best way to get acclimated to your new way of thinking and eating. Attend a national conference and listen to speakers from all over the country who can offer expert advice and address issues regarding vegetarianism.

I would advise you to join both a local and national organization as you continue on with your transition. Even after you are comfortable with your vegetarian lifestyle, it helps to stay connected to a vegetarian network to maintain a sense of synergy and well-being. The local organization can keep you up-to-date about what’s going on in your neck of the woods, while the national organization will give you a larger perspective.

If you can’t find a local support group near you, pay a visit to an alternative health care center. These particular centers often pride themselves on holistic healing traditions, which sometimes include vegetarianism. Most alternative health care centers are associated with hospitals or counseling centers. You local health food store can also point you in the right direction. Health fairs can also offer numerous resources as well.

Treading Gently on the Earth and on Other People’s Feelings

You’ll have countless experiences in the coming years where you’re surrounded by people eating meat, and where maintaining a vegetarian lifestyle is a challenge. You may be on a road trip with friends, and the only place to eat is a fast-food burger joint. Or a family picnic turns out to be a nonstop barbecue with the main fare consisting of burgers, hot dogs, and ribs. In these situations, your only option is to find whatever you can to eat—a glass of apple juice or diet soda, a handful of potato chips, or some coleslaw—and make the best of the situation.

This won’t happen very often, because vegetarians really do have a wide range of food choices, but when it does, it’s up to you to behave with dignity. Eat what you can, and show how adaptable you are. This will not only show them what a charming, mature, and flexible person you are, it’ll also give them a good impression of vegetarianism as a whole. Remember, most nonvegetarians fear that switching to a meatless lifestyle will be boring and difficult. By showing them that it’s not, you’re soft selling vegetarianism.

If you’re dining out with a mixed group of vegetarians and nonvegetarians, do what you can to get everyone to agree on a restaurant that has plenty of vegetarian options. If these are family members or close friends (as opposed to, say, a business function), you can even ask politely if everyone would be okay with eating somewhere that has menu items for vegetarians—it’s likely that they’ll accommodate you with a minimum of grumbling.

If you’re vegan, the challenge will be even greater, and you’ll find that you have to be the most adaptable of all. While most restaurants today plan their menus with an eye toward offering vegetarian options, few offer much—if anything—for vegans. You’ll find that you have to make do when dining out, especially with a mixed group that includes nonvegetarians. But the important thing is to do it with grace and not draw undue attention to your special dietary needs.

In fact, some vegetarians make special allowances for times that they have absolutely no control over the food that’s available and will eat foods made with eggs or dairy. This way, they can socialize with nonvegans without going hungry or risking negative interactions because of their dietary restrictions. It’s not the ideal way to live as a vegan, of course, but we live in an imperfect world. The most important thing is to stay true to your principles, as much as you realistically can, and inspire others to see vegetarianism as a positive, flexible lifestyle. Remember, the more attractive you make it look, the more likely it is that they’ll want to try it themselves!